Generalisation du Jour

[kiya]

[ dithering over icons, finally picking the hawk icon because the generalisation is about anger rather than because I'm feeling some ]

The things that get me angry -- by which I mean blind, shouting, explosive angry -- boil down in essence to variants on feeling that I'm not being heard, especially in cases where I feel that not hearing me is an actively made choice.

Trying to get in a "last word" and then declaring that no response will be heard enrages me. Repeated misinterpretations of points that I felt I had made clear can either frustrate me or get me angry depending on the tone of the misinterpretations (specifically, whether or not I feel the person is trying to understand or not). People doing things I find hurtful and failing to grasp the existence or validity of my pain. People responding to me with accusatively phrased non-sequiturs. People giving me things I specifically do not want, especially when I have explicitly communicated that these are things that I do not want.

Other things can frustrate me, aggravate me, depress me, pain me . . . but they don't seem to make me angry.


I find this both interesting and telling, given my history.

Comments

[serendipoz.livejournal.com]

I grew up in a family where my mother was very hard of hearing. Either I wasn't sure I was being heard at all or I had to shout. Both expressions of anger - or depression.

Habit forming.