To be afraid to sleep. . .

[kiya]

. . . knowing that my subconscious mind is entirely capable of making decisions without consulting the rest of me, and not knowing if my stress levels and feelings of dissolution have gotten to the point at which I'll go to bed and wake up having given up.

I've told Kevin that if I'm still awake when he gets up in the morning, this is why.

. . . and I realize the silence is driving me mad and turn on the changer and get . . .

Addendum: Irony, thy name is music:

Faster than the speed of night,
Faster than the speed of night,
It's all we ever wanted
And all we ever needed
And now it's slipping through our fingers
Faster than the speed of night.

In actuality, it's a lust-song, but . . . .