kiya

Notes for future reference for Rites:
- I need a new offering bowl, since the one I was using for an offering bowl before has been converted into an incense burner for the nonce.
- Very pretty prayer rugs, found by

erispope for me.

Weird thoughts from purification:
- I could smell the chlorine from my natron as I crumbled it into the water for purification. Which was odd.
- My distant analytic me is entertained that the physical/emotional effects of purification ritual are this consistent over time.
- Doing purification ritual while having "Aten-Ra" stuck in my head was really, really odd.

The problem with trying to talk about this is that the context is . . . something that I think is sufficiently private-personal that it's hard to figure out what it is that I can say about it. Which is why I needed to go into Rite over it; Netjer was there at the time, for the conversation, so there would be no confidences spilt talking to Netjer.

So while I'm thinking about that, I'm going to talk about Wepwawet.

I hadn't actually met Wepwawet before, not directly. Not, that is, that oblivious me has noticed.

I was surprised that He showed in my Rite. He seemed amused by the fact that I was surprised, and said: I have always been here. (Yes, with the resonance of that quote. And yes, I'm trolling for

shaddragon now.)

This is one of those duh moments, I guess; I've always had the impression that there was a path before me, and I would reach as far as I could see, and the gate would open and the next road would be there before me. I wrote about this a while back in alt.religion.wicca.moderated and commented on it in my journal as well.

The message I got from Him? Essentially: You have always trusted me. Trust yourself when you are moved by me as well as when you need my guidance.

I have always been here.

I'm still not sure what to say about the context of this. There is someone who has been my teacher in some things for some time; I suspect I have also been a teacher to him in some things.

A long time ago I wrote a poem about him, called Black Phoenix.

We talked recently. He said he had many names. I gave him another: bennu.

He brings out the gods in me.

I . . . hope I opened his way for him.

*dithers about protecting this*
*what the hells, leaves it public*

I need to go to bed soon. Must be up to go to the doctor again early.