kiya

I used to be moderately notorious for being eeped out by piercings. I mean, not on other people, but as a me thing. (There was a thread back on ap where elisem defended my honor from people who thought it would be a fun joke to mock-threaten me with piercing my ears, when I had already said that that was a panic-attack level NOPE. Consent! It's not just for sex, kink, and relationships, people! Respect the fucking triggers.)

Sometime - I dunno whether it was ten or fifteen years ago, a While - I commented that I never saw myself getting the standard earlobe piercings, because yes, that is a grand eep for me (for no particular reason, honestly? but I wonder if it's at least partly some gender-related bullshit immune system response to mandatory femininity assumptions), I could do a cartilage piercing, maybe.

(Possibly I just thought Bajorans were awesome.)

I've gotten ink - my first ink was a very large piece on my shin and I think I confused the artist by being yes, this is absolutely the first thing I want to do even though it's an immense commitment to a large piece on my fucking shinbone - and that's fine. I like ink. I want more ink. I zone out rather pleasantly with ink though the bit that got near my collarbone was unpleasant. (Also right next to my shin was worse than on my shin.)

Anyway, that thought has been kicking around in the interim. For a while I have toyed with it as a major thing to tie to various commitments, in theory, but that never was quite right. And it wasn't something I was planning, particularly, just this constant background thought: this is a thing I could, in theory do. That terrifies me, yes, but not incapacitatingly.

And like jenett has said, one of the things about a witch is looking at the things that eep us out and going, "You know, there's a power there, and I want it."

Doing some various research I discovered that there's a piercing place in the mall next to the junior monkeys' preschool. Further, it's right under the Bertucci's where I stop in on some Tuesdays to get some work done (it's double pizza day; I take the extra home to feed children, and I get time I'm not fucking driving, and right now they have a class right after school so I have even more time). And ... my training recently brought me a tool that I could use to do the thing.

So I prepped, I consulted with artan about whether I was going to hit acupuncture points with what I wanted that would fuck me up mightily (survey results: probably not? no way of knowing? a couple of things in that area kinda want to be poked anyway?), I dropped the kids at school, and I went to the mall. Took a walk, caught some pokemon, and then went to the place.

"Do you have any medical conditions?"

"... yes, a lot. But they're not really relevant aside from my STUPID VASOVAGAL RESPONSE. But I have my water bottle and nowhere I have to be until four."

Did not faint! Only a little bit wobbly, really, but I sat down a bit to be sure, and am now having my pizza, with my very angry right ear with two rings in the rim.

Because I did the damn thing. I could.

"You don't get to be sensible. You get to learn to truly love, which is beyond sense."

This is a first draft, I'm trying to get my thoughts in order. Suggestions for useful revisions are extremely welcome.

( 'God' is a service role. )


The Unitarian Universalist church I attend opens each ceremony with a short prayer, an affirmation, which begins "Love is the spirit of this church and service is its law." (Or 'goal'. Some do it differently, and I can't recall which one is in the order of service right now.) It and I are both descended from the Puritans, who would probably not approve of aspiring to godhood or teachings about finding the divine, holy spark in each other, but nonetheless here we all are.