I think there's a nuance in "if you have to say you is" because there's the insecurity-management-problem version of it, but there is also the transmasculine "I have to say that I am to get anywhere, including in setting up the social improv correctly in the long-term by getting relevant medical care now".

Yeah, artan has a rant or three about how a lot of the traits associated with "man" are simply "adult". (And I was noting that stuff like "kindness" often gets lumped into "woman" the other day.) But there is also a there there somewhere at least in my perception, even if infuriatingly vibes-based rather than articulatable.